Sitting on babies

Gave up my dad's weekend cuz of a no-show party...it's all good though.

I've been needing the quiet and the unbusy recently.

So I'm watching the babies...or really the tv is watching them.

Haha...but soon they'll be listening to christmas songs all day. Like in half an hour I'll turn off the tv.

Yup.

Now...I'm formulating a way to make everything better. Or just...idk...what can i do? Ya'know?

Ugh...This is like the most randomest thing that's happened so far cuz it's like silent but deadly...

Like cancer or HIV or maybe like SIDS.

Sigh...yea...mix cd?

Idk...washed by the water by needtobreathe.



I just want her to know that Ill look after her. She might not feel like she needs it. Idk anything.

In a way...if she let go I wouldn't kno what to do...would it be her breaking the chain or me cuz I would flail and look for solid ground again just as she is too?

That song by the fray how to save a life has gone through my head many times throughout the relationship and alot of people think it's about a person that died or is dying...but from the moment i heard that song I always thought it was about a relationship...not necessarily a romantic one always.

But a connection... a really important part of someones life that they tried everything in their power to keep but failed. If i knew how to save a life.

And it scares me to death like what if I can't do anything. What if i have no power? What if everything I do serves to push her away.

Away from me? Wow...panic much...

Jesus help me. Help us. All of us. Please.

(just turned on 106.7 and mariah carey all i want for christmas is on)

I totally dedicate that song to her.



I really wanna post his eye on the sparrow again....but no....no repeats...

oh well...

I really dont like babysitting. At all. I'm not even getting paid.

oohh...song time!



Moulin Rouge- elephant love medley...

It makes me swoon and want to lie on her couch again...

La forza dell'amor (the power/force of Love)

alrite...type type later...prolly in a few minutes...